To write or not to write?

Eyes wide open, staring at my laptop
Lying in bed, looking around
Thinking what to say
Gazing on the ceiling
There are a lot of thoughts
But I don’t know how to start
I typed some words, sentences, and paragraphs
But I ended up deleting them all
“What to write?” Can anyone help me?
“How to start?” It’s frustrating me
All I know I want to express myself
Singing, scrapbooking, and writing.
Singing to share my heart’s language
Scrapbooking colorfully makes my heart happy
Writing, besides from expressing myself
I feel like I am in a different world
That's what I love about it
Where I can have a voice
Louder as I want
Thoughts seems to explode
I had to say them; I couldn’t sleep
I don’t like it anymore sometimes but why I cannot resist
“Am I really for writing world?” I always asked
To give it a try is not bad at all
Here I am, for how many times thinking to deactivate
I still end up writing
Is this what I want to do?
Or just because everyone does this too?
The first time I ever felt this
I want to write, and I want to pursue this
Doubt hinders me from keeping going
“NO, your write-ups are non-sense.”
“Yes, write to share and express.”
Life is short; do what your heart says.
Keep going, keep writing, and never stop trying.
Until you surely know and say
‘I want to be a writer.’