I’ve learned this Five Love Languages during my younger years. It helped me discover myself and others. When you understand someone’s love language, you are able to adjust easily.
I’m not gonna lie, it’s not that easy all the time. It is truly difficult to adjust to someone unless you learn that person really well.
The Five Love Language is a book written by Gary Champman.
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Quality Time
- Physical Touch
- Receiving gifts
Why is it important to know these things? If you are struggling with your relationship, knowing this helps you adjust to love the right way.
When I did the test few years ago when I was single, my highest score was Words of Affirmation.
I just did the test today, this time I did the test for couples. And guess what? It’s still the same. HAHA I thought I’ve changed a little bit but it’s still my highest. Words are life to me. KIND words I meant.
Here’s the result and the explanation : (from this site)
Words of Affirmation
” Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important – hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. Kind, encouraging, and positive words are truly life-giving.”
If you want to get my heart, tell me endearing words. This way, I may feel love by you. I remember telling my husband when we were still dating few years ago, when I get mad, just tell me “You’re beautiful”, we’ll be good. HAHA So he knows what to do when I get mad, he will start telling me good things and tell me how he appreciates me. Guess what? He never changed. He still the same.
This is my love language. I feel really loved if someone compliments me, appreciates me by telling me wonderful words. And this also kills me, when you say hurtful words, I will remember it and will be really be in pain. I can’t just forget it easily. I am sensitive in this part.
Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter. Finding ways to serve speaks volumes to the recipient of these acts.
Woahh, So, this is now my second. Before, my second to the highest was Quality time. When I got married, mostly of our disagreements and discussion is who do the household chores. I got mad if I will do it alone. Since, we are both working. It is good if we help each other with all the household chores. And thank God, when we talked about it and scheduled the task for the day, he cooperates. And I really appreciate him especially now. He really helps me a lot, when he sees me so tired, he doesn’t want me to do anything. He will do them for me. Thank God for him.
Quality Time
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there – with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby – makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Quality Time also means sharing quality conversation and quality activities.
Love this time with him, as well. And whenever we have the same off day, we tell each other “I’m glad I could spend time with you” AWWW I melt (Words of affirmation pa rin diba? HEHE)
Physical Touch
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face – they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. Physical touch fosters a sense of security and belonging in any relationship.
Though this is not my highest score, I do not neglect this part of a relationship. Every language is important to exercise.
Receiving Gifts
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous – so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are visual representations of love and are treasured greatly.
Last but not the least… Gifts are awesome! But this part of our relationship isn’t my thing. HAHA It is great but this doesn’t affect me that much emotionally.
Here’s my result:
Scores
| 11 | Words of Affirmation |
| 8 | Acts of Service |
| 7 | Quality Time |
| 3 | Physical Touch |
| 1 | Receiving Gifts |
It is important to understand every love language so you will know how to express your love to your partner. This doesn’t only apply to your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife, it could also express to any kind of relationship – friendship, family, parents, workmates etc.
Feel free to test yourself. What’s your love language?
Take the test here.
Love Matters. 🙂 Thank you for being here.
Day 1: 20 Random Facts About You
